Psychics and Magic apparently do mix!
by TheLastDragonLord
Summary: Just a simple series of 30 oneshots centered around the Psych characters in the Harry Potter universe. Some Shules.


A/N: This was a really fun crossover to write! I may do more for other fandoms, so look out for those. Also, lots of these are Shules-y, so if you don't ship it, sorry. Anyway, enjoy!

**Broomstick**  
The first time Shawn ever got on a broomstick, he lifted two feet into the air, then fell off and sprained his ankle. It took Gus a bit longer to actually summon the courage to mount his, but upon doing so, he started crying after rising four inches and subsequently had to be taken off.

**Magic**  
Juliet was Muggleborn. She didn't come from a magic family, like Shawn, Gus, and Carlton did. She was a perfectly normal child until she was six years old. On her mother's 40th birthday, a proud little Juliet approached her and showed her the flowers she'd made for her present. Right before Mrs. O'Hara's shocked eyes, little purple flowers began sprouting out of thin air above her daughter's hands.  
She was taken to several doctors after that, as more and more unexplainable phenomena happened around her. No matter how much she protested, insisted that she could be normal, the tests and scans kept coming, all coming up empty. Finally, near Juliet's 11th birthday, the family was visited by a kind Scottish woman who introduced herself as Professor McGonagall. She explained everything, how Juliet was born with magic inside of her that was itching to be released, how she could be trained in the magic arts at a place called Hogwarts, how she was special. Her mother and step-father weren't sure to be relieved or more worried, but after talking with the professor and each other, they reluctantly agreed to send Juliet to school. And the tests finally stopped.

**Wand**  
It took 29 different tries before Shawn finally found a wand that worked. The shop was practically in shambles, with boxes littered all over the floor, discarded. This one jerked to the left too much, this one was too stiff. Gus had found his on the third try easily and was testing it outside in front of proud parents. Meanwhile, Shawn's mother was helping Mr. Ollivander look for potential wands and his father was muttering under his breath about having raised a Squib.  
Finally, Ollivander emerged from a back room, looking exhausted but confident, Shawn's mother behind him. He bent down and handed Shawn a dusty, black box with a smile.  
"No wizard I've ever encountered has failed to find the wand for him within 30 tries," he wheezed. "This'll be the one."  
Shawn pulled the wand out, giving another glance to his hopeful mother and disappointed father. He took a deep breath and waved. The wilting flower in the vase on Ollivander's desk gave a spark and grew taller, color returning to its petals as it bloomed.  
His mother gave a shout of happiness, clapping her hands. A look at his father got him a small smile and a nod. Ollivander merely sighed in success.  
"I think we have a winner."

**Diagon Alley**  
Juliet was absolutely overwhelmed during her first visit to Diagon Alley. It was her first real exposure to the Wizarding World that she was now a part of and she didn't know where to start! There were dozens and dozens of shops, selling owls, magic wands, flying broomsticks, spell books, and everything else that up until a few weeks ago she'd believed to be imaginary.  
Professor McGonagall, whom she learned would later be her Transfiguration teacher (whatever the heck Transfiguration was), had given her a list of things she needed to get started at her new school but she couldn't help stopping at every single store, just to browse and bask in the wonder of this new world.

**Platform 9 3/4**  
"You nervous?" eleven-year-old Shawn Spencer tentatively asked his best friend Gus, not taking his eyes off of the wall.  
"Nope."  
"Good. Me neither."  
They were both nervous. The intimidating brick wall loomed before them and they both clutched their trolley carts a bit tighter. It was their first real trial of the wizarding world: Platform 9 3/4. They'd been preparing together for weeks, running through sheets hung in doorways, thinking themselves ready for the challenge. However, there's a big difference in running through a sheet and running through a brick wall.  
"Go on, boys," Mrs. Guster nudged them both towards the wall. "Don't be scared!"  
"You go first, Gus."  
"I'm not going first!" Gus protested. "You go first!"  
"How about you both go at the same time?" Mr. Spencer suggested. "That way, if it doesn't work and you both hit your heads, you'll stay in the same hospital room."  
"Henry!" his wife scolded. "Don't scare them! Of course it'll work!"  
Shawn and Gus, with a newfound fear, turned to each other, nodded solemnly, and ran.

**Gryffindor**  
Carlton Lassiter knew before he was even accepted into Hogwarts that he would be a Gryffindor. It was family tradition and an undisputed certainty. His father had been a Gryffindor, his mother had been a Gryffindor, his mother's new girlfriend was once a Gryffindor, and when his sister joined him at Hogwarts in a few years, she would be a Gryffindor, too.  
The Sorting Hat had barely touched his head when it screamed out "GRYFFINDOR!" The pride surging through the eleven-year-old was nearly staggering and he couldn't help but puff out his chest as he briskly walked to the table of his soon-to-be peers.

**Ravenclaw**  
Shawn would never tell anyone, but the Sorting Hat almost put him in Ravenclaw. It had actually had quite a bit of trouble deciding on which House in which to place him. It mused that he certainly was a brave one, but also quite loyal and smarter than he himself knew. But in the end, the cunning won out, and he ended up in Slytherin.  
It wouldn't be embarrassing if it weren't for the fact that before the ceremony, he'd been telling Gus that Ravenclaw was the 'House of Nerds.'

**Hufflepuff**  
It was after dinner on September 1st, and as the older Hufflepuff students mingled with the new first years, one eleven-year-old sat in an armchair off to the side, sulking. She'd wanted to sorted into Gryffindor. Or maybe Ravenclaw. Heck, even Slytherin would've been okay. Just not Hufflepuff. Anything was better than Hufflepuff, no matter how comfortable their chairs were. She slumped further with a huff.  
Another first-year, a boy, approached. She stared at him.  
"What's wrong?" he asked with a genuinely concerned expression. She crossed her arms and looked away.  
"Nothing..." she muttered with a sigh.  
He sat on the footrest in front of her and just stared, waiting. With a roll of her eyes, she muttered an answer.  
"I wanted to be in Gryffindor..."  
"Everyone wants to be in Gryffindor," he replied. "But what's wrong with Hufflepuff?"  
"Hufflepuff is the lame House!" she whispered (grumpy or not, she didn't want anyone else hearing her badmouthing their home). "It's for the leftovers! We're not brave enough for Gryffindor, not smart enough for Ravenclaw, and not cunning enough for Slytherin!"  
He looked thoughtful for a moment.  
"Wanna know what my momma told me before I left?" he asked. She nodded hesitantly. He smiled.  
"She said," he continued, "that Hufflepuff is the House for all the kids who are so brave, smart _and_ cunning that the Sorting Hat can't decide where to put them."  
The girl paused. "Was she in Hufflepuff?"  
He nodded and she gave a small smile.  
"By the way," he added, "my name is Burton Guster. But you can call me Gus."  
"I'm Juliet."

**Quidditch  
**Both Lassiter and Juliet tried out for their House Quidditch teams in their First Years. Lassiter was pureblood and had practically been raised on a broom. He made Beater easily. Juliet, however, was Muggleborn. She'd never ridden a broom in her life and was one of many who didn't make it. Disappointed, she practiced all throughout the year (and over the summer) and tried again the next year. And though she still wasn't great, the Hufflepuff captain gave her a chance and took her on as an alternate. She was promoted to Chaser the next year.  
Shawn didn't have much interest in playing Quidditch until his Fourth Year (it might've been around the time he started to develop more-than-friendly feelings towards Juliet but it was most certainly _not_ done in an attempt to impress her), at which point he tried out and made it as Slytherin Keeper.  
Gus was the only one of the four friends who never tried out for Quidditch. He had never gotten over his first terrifying experience on a broomstick and simply enjoyed sitting in the stands with whichever of his three friends wasn't playing at the time.

**Whomping Willow  
**Shawn and Gus sat in the infirmary merely a week into their first year, bruised and bloodied from their venture to see the famed Shrieking Shack. Rumor had it that there was a secret tunnel somewhere near the Whomping Willow. They hadn't taken the name seriously.  
"What the heck kind of school," moaned Shawn from his bed, "plants a kick-boxing tree on their grounds? That's insane!"  
"It looked so beautiful from a distance," his best friend wheezed. "Leaves just starting to shed, all red and gold. So beautiful, yet so deadly..."  
"I'll tell you one thing, Gus. We're not giving up. We're gonna find a way to that Shack if it kills us!"  
"At this rate, it probably will."

**Hagrid's Hut**  
Very soon after beginning their first year, Shawn and Gus easily befriended the gentle (half) giant teacher/caretaker called Hagrid, and often spent time at his hut throughout the years. They were, after all, two of his best students. But no matter how much they cared for Hagrid, it got harder and harder to plaster fake smiles on their faces and pretend to like his cooking each time they visited.

**Black Lake  
**For the entirety of his seven years at Hogwarts, Burton Guster never once set foot in the lake. He already didn't like large bodies of water that weren't pools, but the minute someone told him about the Giant Squid, any fleeting thoughts of going swimming high-tailed it and he never stood within twenty feet of the water's edge.

**Zonko's Joke Shop**  
Thirteen-year-old Shawn nearly faints upon entering the joke shop for the first time. It was heaven. Rows upon rows of stink bombs, fake love potions, exploding crackers, and more.  
"Think of the pranks," he whispers reverently. "Think of the pranks we can pull on Lassie!" He spreads his arms wide, gesturing to the store. "Gus, I present to you, our new home away from home."

**Spells**  
Shawn was a talented spell-caster, and he knew it. Most magic just came easily to him. However, if it would get Juliet to wrap her small, soft hand around his on his wand to show him the proper waving technique, well, he didn't mind playing dumb every once in a while.

**Great Hall**  
Shawn didn't especially like mealtimes at Hogwarts. Sure, the food was delicious, but students from different Houses weren't allowed to sit with each other. He liked the Slytherins well enough but, well, lots of them were really mean, racist and/or snobbish, with very few exceptions. So he liked to strategically sit where he had a nice view of the Hufflepuff table. During meals, he could look up and see Gus and Juliet eating happily with their nice Hufflepuff friends. The sight always made him feel a little lonely.

**Parchment**  
"Hey, Jules, can I borrow a piece of parchment?"  
She looked up with a wry smile. "Why, you planning on giving it back once you've used it?"  
"Point taken. Can I _have_ a piece of parchment?"  
"Sure. Here,"  
"Thanks."  
They work in silence for another five minutes.  
"Jules? Can I have another piece?"  
"Uh, yeah, go ahead."  
Three more minutes pass.  
"Jules?"  
"Why do you need so much parchment?"  
He frowns. "Because quills don't have erasers, Jules! There's one thing the Muggles have done better than us, and that's the invention of erasers!"  
She just drops five more sheets in front of him with a sigh and a smile.

**Love Potion**  
In his Fifth Year, Shawn attempted to give Lassiter a love potion to make him fall in love with Professor McGonagall for a day. He'd been sneaking ingredients out of Snape's cabinet for weeks. However, he'd never been very good with potions and the plan backfired when he accidentally screwed up the ingredients and made Lassiter infatuated with him instead. All day, he was forced to put up with the Gryffindor's offers to carry his books, do his homework, and sit with him at meals. Finally, the effect wore off, much to Shawn's relief, but he was then forced to endure Lassiter's rage for an entire week afterwards.

**Exams**  
Shawn yawned and scratched his head before collapsing onto the table with a defeated sigh, face in book.  
"This sucks," his muffled voice moaned. "Can we go to bed now?"  
Across from him, a fully alert Juliet rolled her eyes. "No, Shawn. We've got O.W.L.s tomorrow! We have to study as much as we can before it's too late! You don't wanna fail, do you?"  
"At this point, if it means I can go to bed, I'll take a T."  
"You don't mean that, Shawn," reasoned Gus beside him, intently reading a Charms book. Shawn lifted his head to glare at him.  
"Yes, I do, Gus. Because unlike some people here, I value my personal health above getting a good grade."  
This seemed to soften Juliet a bit and she put down her quill. Seeing this, Shawn continued.  
"Come on, Jules. Even if you memorize all these techniques and vocabulary words and all, how will they help you if you're exhausted tomorrow?"  
She paused, then nodded and shut her book.  
"You're right. Let's get some sleep."

**Professor McGonagall**  
"Mr. Spencer," the elderly Scottish woman sighed as she gazed upon the Fifth Year sitting before her, smug grin firmly in place, "this is the ninth time this month you've been in detention for stuffing some species of rodent down Mr. Lassiter's robes. Tell me, do you honestly not comprehend the discipline at this establishment or are you aspiring to be a delinquent your entire life?"

**Pumpkin Juice**  
When Shawn kissed Juliet for the first time, she tasted like Pumpkin Juice.  
Right after dinner, he'd pulled her, protesting, into an alcove off the Great Hall. Tired of fighting with her, he'd admitted that yes, he was jealous of Declan, not because he was rich or knew Curt Smith, but because he was dating her.  
At this revelation, Juliet stopped struggling and listened as he went on, awkwardly confessing that he'd rather liked her for a while now and would she maybe like to go on a date with him?  
Juliet said nothing but merely smiled wide and nodded. Shawn grinned, still thoroughly embarrassed by his little speech, but pleased at her response. Before he could say anything else, though, Juliet pulled him down by the collar and kissed him. The only thing Shawn registered before his brain short circuited was that she tasted like Pumpkin Juice, his favorite drink.

**Hogsmeade**  
For their first date, Shawn took Juliet to Hogsmeade. Yes, he knew it was cliché; it was where all the Hogwarts boys took their girlfriends for dates. However, there surprisingly weren't many other options to show a girl a good time at a magical boarding school.  
He took her to Fortescue's for ice cream and committed her favorite flavor to memory for future reference (two scoops of strawberry with whipped cream and nuts). Afterwards, they walked back to the school hand-in-hand and Juliet gave him a peck on the cheek before heading back toward the Hufflepuff dorms.  
With pink cheeks and a crooked grin, Shawn bounded down to his common room.

**Howler**  
Though Gus was supremely against the idea, Shawn decided to send Juliet a Howler the morning after she agreed to date him. And during breakfast, from two tables down (rules were rules, regardless of inter-House dating), he watched her eyes widen in fear when her owl delivered the mail. He grinned into his Pumpkin Juice as she shakily opened the envelope.  
"MY GOODNESS JULES, YOU LOOK LOVELY TODAY," the shouting echoed across a now-silent Great Hall. "I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE MY GIRLFRIEND NOW. WE SHOULD MAKE OUT LATER. SINCERELY, YOUR BOYFRIEND SHAWN SPENCER, JULIET O'HARA'S BOYFRIEND."  
The silence prevailed for another couple of seconds before the normal chatter resumed, interspersed with laughs. Shawn gave a little wave to his red-faced girlfriend, who glared back with murder in her eyes.  
"I told him not to do it," muttered Gus beside her.

**Yule Ball**  
Much to Gus's surprise, Shawn did not at all delay in asking Juliet to be his date to the Yule Ball. He'd been expecting reluctance, nervousness, and possibly even denial, though the couple had already been on two dates.  
But the morning after the event was announced, Shawn immediately sought out his lady love and asked. Judging by the wide grins on both of their faces during breakfast, she'd said yes.

**Slytherin**  
Shawn knew exactly why the Sorting Hat put him in the House of Slytherin. He'd always had a slight problem with telling the truth 100% of the time, and some might call him mischievous. And he'd always been rather proud of his House. Not all the other kids were Death Eaters-to-be, after all.  
But some of the looks he got when he let his Half-Blood best friend and Muggle-born girlfriend into the Slytherin common room made him wonder why he wasn't put somewhere else.

**Potions**  
Shawn and Gus had made a game of who could subtly drop extra ingredients into Lassiter's potion when he wasn't looking. Because it was usually only two Houses to a class, they'd write down what happened, how badly it exploded, how angry Snape was, and if they got caught and compare notes the next day. Gus was the current champion, having one time dumped sixteen frog eggs into Lassiter's half-made concoction which all hatched in the cauldron and attacked the class, earning the protesting Gryffindor detention for a week.

**The Leaky Cauldron**  
"Tom, my good man,"  
"What is it, Spencer?"  
"Two Firewhiskeys, please. On the double."  
"You of age yet?"  
"That's hardly relevant."  
"Right. Two Butterbeers, then."  
" ... Yeah, okay."

**Owl**  
"Shawn, you cannot speak to owls."  
"Yes, I can, Gus. For instance, your owl is saying that he never brings you mail from home because your parents hate you."  
"He's not saying that, Shawn!"  
"What's mine saying?"  
"Don't encourage him, Juliet."  
"Why, Jules, Ramona here says you don't feed her enough treats. She's gotta lug all of your mail and she gets tired."  
"Awww! Poor baby..."  
"He can't talk to owls, Juliet!"

**House Points**  
The biggest prank Shawn and Gus ever pulled was in their Sixth Year. It was extremely elaborate and involved a small army of chickens, two buckets of blue paint, one entire ball of twine and the Headmaster's chair in the Great Hall. They pulled it off without a hitch and made Hogwarts history by losing the greatest number of points for two Houses in one go. They were both locked out of their dormitories by their classmates for the rest of the year.  
Shawn still says it was all worth it.

**Prefects**  
"So you're still going out with that Spencer idiot?"  
Juliet rolled her eyes for the millionth time. As Head Boy and Girl, she and Lassiter did rounds together every night to make sure that all students were in bed. And nearly every night, they had the same conversation.  
"Yes, Carlton. _Shawn_ and I are still dating. Do you really have to keep asking?"  
He shrugged, keeping his eyes forward on the hall ahead. "Just checking to see if you've come to your senses yet."  
She sighed. "Really, what is your problem with him? He stopped playing pranks on you years ago," (He glared.) "for the most part, anyway. Why can't you just accept the fact that I like him?"  
Lassiter said nothing, still frowning, and started walking faster. She sped up, cursing his long legs.  
"Seriously, Carlton. You're my best friend and it really hurts to know that you don't support my relationship with Shawn!"  
Now he stopped and looked at her with softened eyes. "As your best friend, you should know that I'm never going to think any guy is good enough for you."  
She smiled softly, touched. "Thank you for looking out for me, Carlton. But I assure you, Shawn treats me very well. And if he ever didn't, you know I could easily beat him up."  
He chuckled. "Fair enough. You can take care of yourself."

**Forbidden Forest**  
"Shawn, there's a reason this place is called the _Forbidden_ Forest. You know that, right? They didn't just make up that name for kicks."  
Shawn sighed. "The name is irrelevant, Gus. They take first years in here for detention. It can't be all that bad."  
"Remember what happened the last time we ignored a name," Gus insisted. "Does _Whomping Willow_ ring a bell?"  
Shawn grimaced. "It does. And not a soft, tinkling bell at that. More like a giant, brass bell that clangs and makes cartoon characters shake all over when they hear it. But that is neither here nor there. The Whomping Willow has an explicit title. It whomps. That's clear. However, this forest is only forbidden. We're not told why. For example, this could be where all the professors get together and play poker on weekends."  
"Or it could be the home of several ravenous monsters who want to eat us!"  
"Gus please," Shawn reasoned. "Why would they put a children's school right next to a forest that dangerous?"  
"Why would they plant a Whomping Willow on the grounds of a children's school? Why is there a giant squid in the lake next to it?" Gus added. "Because this place is crazy, Shawn!"

A/N: Please review and let me know how I did!


End file.
